Life in the Comfort Zone

Growing up in Akron, Ohio, an industrial Midwest town of about 300,000, seemed great to me to be honest. I was coming of age in the 1970s and looking back I think that I may have been shielded from the bigger world at large because most of the people I knew were pretty much living the same as I was, so I think I just assumed that this is the way it was everywhere. We were all content with what we had so there was not too big of a push to leave. We had all that we would need right there in Tire Town. Sure, I would notice from time to time that others had parents that went to work in office buildings instead of a tire factory, some seemed to have bigger houses, shiner cars, and went out to eat more than me but life was pretty good as far as I knew. My life was a lot of fun.

As I started to become a little older and started paying closer attention, I noticed that to do some (ALL) of the “fun” things you needed to have some scratch in your pocket. A nice car sure helped you meet the pretty girls and living on the “right” side of town had its advantages as well. I started to notice that people went on these things called vacations and that there was a pretty amazing world outside of the 10-mile radius around Akron that I was exclusively living in. At that time in my life going forty miles to Cleveland was a major event! Going somewhere outside of Ohio was simply crazy talk. But I did start to notice and pay attention. I also noticed that when dad and mom got home from work, they were tired and from the conversations I overheard that they did not seem to be always joyful of all those hours they were away from the elegant palace on Stevenson Avenue.

I noticed a titanic shift in what I valued and felt a drive within me to go after these new “things” vigorously. I realized I was not as content as I once was. I felt at times like I was missing a “better life.” I was envious of what others had and realized that there were various levels of living that were invisible to me earlier. So, I started to chase. I started to work so that I could have a car of my own, move out and get a place that I could call my own, put myself through school, take the really pretty girls out, do fun things with my buddies, and live life the “right” way, I soon noticed that it was going to take more than $2.00 an hour I was making but that’s all I seemed to be worth to employers at the time. As you know, coming to that cold reality was a real kick in the rear end. Is that really my “value?” I also started to feel a battle going on in my heart and mind for the spiritual part of life. I had gone to church my whole life up to then and believed in God but there was clearly a conflict on what living a good life seemed to mean. I wanted to find my Life in the Comfort Zone. How will I know if I am there? The things I value will determine my behavior, so what do I value highly? Seems like that should be an easy question to answer. Not so much for me. The chase continued.

The world values money over relationships, temporal possessions, recognition, and gaining power. God’s value system contrasts with the world’s value system. God values relationships over money, eternal rewards, humility, and servant leadership. You really cannot do both, you must pick what you will pursue and what is of value to you. Like billions before me, I chose to give the world first dibs and went toward that. Kept trying to not to be worldly and be a man of faith but it is a lifelong challenge.

It seems that I, like many others (everyone), have a natural tendency through our own efforts to find our Life in the Comfort Zone and then dig our heels firmly in place. It is a control thing; it is a pride thing. If I am in a situation or lifestyle where I am perfectly capable of handling everything, I have stopped growing in my understanding of God. I have discovered that it is His desire is to take me from where I am to where He wants me to be.

I have learned that I am always one step of obedience away from the next truth God wants me to learn about Him. It appears as a restlessness where I sense that there is far more I should be learning and experiencing about Him. At separate times this meant that I needed to move to a new location or take a new job. It also revealed that I needed a deeper dimension added to my prayer life and trusting God to a degree I never had before.

The fisherman could not remain in their fishing boats and become apostles. Abraham was seventy-five years old when God gave him his major life assignment. These men had to disrupt their comfortable routine to reach new heights in their relationship with their Lord. Likewise, to experience God to the degree He wants us to, there will be adjustments He will ask of us. The question that kept coming to my mind was, Am I willing to abandon that which makes me comfortable (a lot of times the answer was no)? Can I even live outside of my comfort zone or am I staying put?

That is what I have decided to focus on today, Life in the Comfort Zone (and outside of it). I have a story where He was directing me toward a chance to obey and see Him in a way that was so much better than being content in the bubble of comfort and led to a greater revelation of Him and presented opportunities to serve. God does not want us to merely gain intellectual knowledge of truth. He wants us to experience His truth.

But First… A Joke:

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: “Ugh, that’s the ugliest baby I’ve ever seen!” The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: “The driver just insulted me!”

The man says: “You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I’ll hold your monkey for you.”

Bonus Dad Joke:

What breed of dog can jump higher than buildings?

Any dog, buildings cannot jump.

A Verse to Contemplate:

Whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave - just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many. - Matthew 20: 26-28

Have I Told You This One?

Life in the Comfort Zone is not always easy, but it is familiar, and familiar seems safe. It is like driving versus flying. When I am driving my car, I feel like I am in control and that gives me comfort even though I am doing one of the most dangerous things you can be doing (statistically speaking), especially in Atlanta where I live now. When I get on a jet and leave the driving to the pilots, I am giving up control. I am putting my life into their hands and that can be unsettling, especially when the turbulence cranks up even though, statistically speaking, I am traveling the safest way to go. An airplane crash is rare.

One story from the Gospel of Luke in the Bible about the difference between hearing and experiencing and how obedience changes everything. It is a story everyone has probably heard at some point.

When Christ teaches you something about Himself, He implements it into your life through experience. As the crowds gathered around, Jesus chose to board Peter’s boat and teach the people from there. All day long Peter sat in the boat listening to Jesus teach the multitudes. At the close of his discourse, Jesus allowed Peter to experience the reality of what he had just taught the crowd. The crowd had heard the truth, but Peter was to experience it.

Jesus put his teaching into language a fisherman could understand. He told Peter to put out his nets into the deep water. Peter hesitated, “Master, we have toiled all night and caught nothing.” He was tired. He was not expecting a dramatic encounter with God at a time like that. Yet, as Peter obeyed Jesus, he pulled in such a miraculous catch of fish that his boat almost sank! Peter was filled with amazement and recognized that he had just experienced the power of God. He learned that with a command from Jesus, he could do anything. Jesus was able to reorder Peter’s priorities from catching fish to catching men. Peter’s obedience led to a dramatic insight into the person of Jesus.

In 1984 I moved to Atlanta and took a job with a valuation company. I value privately held companies for various purposes. After almost 15 years with that company, I decided to move to a new company. I had told them that I was good at what I could do and that I would be an asset to them and open new areas of practice. They hired me and now I had to prove it.

One of the areas that I had avoided up until then was litigation support. I really did not want to do that because I felt very out of my comfort zone and there was a lot of pressure to win when it went to court. The job of the attorneys is to make you look as bad as possible, and they are exceptionally good at it. I am hired as an expert witness and most of the time, the outcome of the case depends on the valuation to support the damages of an action by one of the parties against the other. Well, we got hired to do an assignment for a big law firm downtown and yours truly is picked to do the analysis and to give testimony. Gulp.

I am hoping the case settles before trial but that does not happen. I go through deposition and when the court date arrives, I show up to testify (scared but cannot let that show). I sit there for an entire first day outside of the courtroom and do not get called. I was relieved but it just postponed until the next day. Day two arrives after a sleepless night and I sit outside until late in the afternoon and I get called in. I had been praying out there as I waited for somehow to get out of this because I was really feeling out of my comfort zone. I did not want to lose my first one. I get to the stand and get sworn in and the opposing attorney makes a point to the judge, the judge agrees, and the case is dismissed. I am free. However, my attorney is not happy and plans to appeal. Several months later I am back in the same position.

This time I feel ready but still concerned since I had never done this yet but wanted to prove myself to my new employer. I refocus this time around and my prayers are that I do an excellent job for my client, tell the truth and leave the results to the judge and to Him. As I provide my testimony I realize for the first time in my life that I am the smartest guy in the room (STOP LAUGHING). The opposing attorney is leading down a path that he really should not be going down. He is being extremely dramatic and trying to box me in to admit that I had made a major mistake when in fact it was their valuation expert that had made the huge error. I saw it coming and could not wipe the smile off my face. I caught the eye of my attorney, and he knew it too but told me to not get cocky and blow it. The other attorney fell into his own trap and when I corrected him everyone in the courtroom knew he had really stepped in it. We ended up winning the case and I was congratulated at work, and it made a significant difference in my career. The Lord let me experience the difference in praying for the right thing versus trying to get out of it completely and to experience much more joy from the experience versus the joy of just getting out of it. It was my version of getting my boat loaded with a ton of fish when I was expecting truly little and in fact just wanted to park the boat at the dock and stop for the day.

The caring affirmation from almighty God is what brings peace, fulfillment, and security. People’s praise is fickle, but Christ’s is consistent and valid. You live in quiet confidence when you highly value the acceptance of Jesus. Even if I had lost, I felt like I was getting to experience a much fuller life experience.

It is scary to think that even though the Lord may be speaking to me right now, if I am too preoccupied with the past or the future, I could miss hearing his voice. Indeed, God speaks in the present what he wants us to know now. He is with his children even when we are unaware. To behold his glory requires living in the moment with him by faith.

With age comes discernment. I know that I still chase the wrong things at times and that makes me sad and frankly angry when I slow down enough to even realize it. I have had a string of tough things happen to me and my family over the past several years and I am still dealing with the grief and repercussions of that. I fail more than I want to admit but I also know that I am loved by a sovereign God that wants me to experience a much fuller life than one spent living in the Comfort Zone of my own making. Let us be brave and be willing to trust Him.

What He has for me, and you are always so much better.

A Prayer:

Lord, lead me in simple living, free from the world’s distractions and desires. Help me to see, understand, and prioritize what truly matters, loving you and loving others. Being a servant with a life that reflects your peace and contentment. Guide my focus to eternal values rather than earthly possessions and honors. Guide me in living with purpose and intention. Amen.

Book Recommendation:

The Power of a Praying Husband by Stormie Omartian (2014)

Music Recommendation:

A Farewell to Kings by Rush (1977)

Quote of the Day:

‘The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the realist adjusts the sails.’ – William Arthur Ward

Cool Place to Visit:

Warm Springs, Georgia